Things Women Can Do If They Feel Pain During Intercourse

Things Women Can Do If They Feel Pain During Intercourse

Having sex is one of the best things a person can do to de-stress. The pleasure they get from sexual activity is so powerful that they forget about their worries in life. That is especially true if sex is done with someone they care about and feels the same for them. Unfortunately, some women struggle to feel this way about sex. That is because they get hurt during intercourse. Hurt in this context does not mean the kinky type of hurt, but the one where the person literally feels pain.

Things Women Can Do If They Feel Pain During Intercourse

The Pain First-timers Feel

It is normal for virgin women to get hurt during their first sexual intercourse or insertion. That is because their hymen gets stretched by the male genitalia, the finger, or the sex toy upon entry. This causes bleeding, pain, or irritation. Women with more hymenal tissues feel this more than those who have less or do not have any at all. The pain is usually felt for only a few minutes. Then it gets overpowered by the pleasure made by the movement of the male genitalia. 

If the pain does not go away, even after multiple sessions, that means there is something wrong. Usually, it is a chronic problem.

Its Effect on the Sexual Health of Women

According to a study by the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, as many as 75% of women will feel pain at one point in their lives. Though, it should happen only once; the pain is persistent in some cases. Dyspareunia is the medical term for this condition.

Dyspareunia has a massive impact on the sexual health and wellness of the woman. They could stop having sex entirely, or they would refuse to do so even if they want to. They would not even do it with a sex doll. All of that because they feel unbearable pain which was supposed to be gratification. 

Some even feel guilty about having this problem. Affected women feel like their partners can never be happy with them due to being unable to attend to their partner’s sexual needs. And even if they do, there is an added responsibility to make sure that they are not hurt so much. Women feel that it makes sex less fun and engaging. Consequently, knowing their condition, they refuse to go on dates or end their relationship with their partner. They believe there is no point in a sexless, intimacy-lacking relationship. Thus, the condition also affects their mental and emotional health. 

The study also found out that women tend to blame their condition for something they did in the past. Wherein they frequently have zero faults for it. 

Dr. Jeniffer Anger, a urologist, suggested that instead of steering away from sex, women who suffer from this condition should seek a doctor and ask for medical help. She says that these conditions are treatable, so there is no need to shut themselves from intimacy and sexual pleasure.

Things Women Can Do If They Feel Pain During Intercourse

Common Causes of the Dyspareunia

Here are some of the possible reasons why women feel pain during sex. As said before, they can be treated medically. So once symptoms are felt, check with your doctor for proper diagnosis and cure.


The pain is most commonly caused by a dry vagina. When there is insufficient vaginal lubrication, the movements from the penetrating genitalia or object causes pain. In addition to that, a dry vagina has fewer good bacterias. This results in infections that add to the pain felt during intercourse.


This is the condition where the muscles of a woman’s vagina involuntarily squeeze when something is trying to penetrate it. There are two types of Vaginismus. The first one is called lifelong Vaginismus, which is when a woman has never been able to insert anything into their vagina. Acquired Vaginismus is the second type. It is when a woman had no trouble having sex before, but then it became difficult or impossible for them. 

Vaginismus is commonly related to fear of sex or the pain it causes. It is not clear, however, if the anxiety or the traumatic experience came first.

Pelvic Floor Dysfunction

This is the condition when a person cannot correctly relax and coordinate their pelvic floor muscles to urinate or have a bowel movement. For women, this inability can cause dyspareunia or pain during sex.

Psychological Reasons

Sometimes, the pain is caused not by a medical condition but by a psychological one. It could be caused by stress and anxiety. Stress can tighten or cause tension on the pelvic floor muscles, thus, making sex painful. In this case, who you need to seek is a sex coach or a therapist instead of a regular doctor.

Things Women Can Do to Reduce or Remove the Pain

Women who experience dyspareunia are not helpless. There are things they can do to enjoy sex even while they are still in ongoing treatment. 

Using of Lubrication

Again, the most common cause of the pain during intercourse is dryness in the vagina. So, using lubrication products to compensate for the lack of natural lubrication is the best move women can make. With this method, women can say goodbye to pain and welcome to pleasure. 

Choose all-natural, water-based lubrication so you can still practice safe sex.

Prolong the Foreplay

Studies have proven that women naturally have a lower sex drive than men. Men’s sex drive is more straightforward, while women’s depend on many things. It can take time before a woman reaches a level of arousal that will produce enough lubrication for penetrative sex. So, spending more time in foreplay – hugging, kissing, caressing, oral sex, will help the woman prepare for the insertion. 

Engage in other sexual activities

Sex does not always need to end in penetration. There are other erotic activities out there that you can enjoy. Maybe try mutual masturbation? There is also oral sex which you can simultaneously perform via 69-position. By experimenting and exploring these things, women can still have a healthy sex life while unable to commit to sexual intercourse. 

Things Women Can Do If They Feel Pain During Intercourse

These things, combined with sex therapy, will keep the passion and intimacy going until they are ready to experience sex at its best form again. Eventually, they will be able to enjoy sex without fear of pain.

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